Online Dating for the Sensitive Soul

Online dating can bring about high expectations for romance while usually delivering something more between a booty call and a wedding date. It’s really like a box of chocolates, and no matter how direct your profile is, or how clear your conversation is, you never really know what kind of date you are going to get. With that said, I do believe online dating has potential for something amazing. The biggest piece to grasp of online dating is maintaining inner peace amidst uncertainty. I wanted to share some tools I’ve learned as a sensitive person myself to bring peace throughout the process.

  1. Don’t hook up with your date right away. No matter how cute they are, how spiritual they claim to be, or how vegan they are, it doesn’t mean they are going to love you unconditionally, forever. As a sensitive person who understands everything is connected and everything is energy, you mustn’t exchange sexual energy with them without a commitment. As sensitive people, we will start feeling that unconditional bond that comes with closeness and not everyone feels that way with sex in this desensitized society. It’s sad, but we are surrounded by people who truly are incapable of feeling because of diet, or media exposure, or lifestyle. You can hook up if you must, but just be prepared to visit #5.
  2. Texting with someone over a period of time does not necessarily mean you are bonding at all. Seems weird, right? You’ve been getting good morning and goodnight texts for weeks, and they text you their yummy vegan meals, and let you know they are thinking about you. In your universe, this means something, right? In the world of online dating, there may be three other conversations going on similarly with multiple people. In the just-swipe-to-find-your-soulmate culture, instant gratification in the land of a million options to choose from is the name of the game. The only way to truly be sure they are feeling the same way is to regularly see each other in person.
  3. Trust your intuition. They said all the right things, even have a million coincidences with your life story, yet didn’t text you the next day? Red flags should not be ignored. Chances are they are not as sensitive as they portrayed, didn’t really catch any major feels no matter what they said, and are on date #2 for the weekend. People always present their best selves on dates and are not always as they seem. The red flag you ignored that didn’t feel right to you will ultimately be the reason you visit #5 later.
  4. Avoid narcissists playing games with your sensitivity. I once dated a guy who really hurt my feelings by not making plans for a second date. A few weeks later, he started blaming me for us not working out because I was still accepting dates with other guys. This took me for a loop. He actually had me feel bad for a behavior that was a logical response to his behavior of not reciprocating interest. Complicated, right? Turns out, he didn’t really want me anyway. He just wanted the power to control who I was dating or not dating like some kind of ego stroke. If someone is being heart-centered, they’d never shame you or guilt you into a behavior. Especially if they aren’t even observing that same behavior (ex. they get mad you still have Tinder dates, yet they are still active on Tinder). If someone is saying something contrary to your purest intentions, trust yourself over anyone else’s opinion and don’t let yourself get manipulated.
  5. Heartbreak is sometimes inevitable. You caught some feels while your date did not. You are a deeply feeling human and it’s okay. Heartbreak means you are on the path to finding what you truly want, and you are closer than ever now that you are no longer wasting time on the wrong person. Let yourself feel it, but don’t wallow too long. Meditate on the infinite abundance of the universe and realize true love won’t be denied to you when it’s right. Trust in the reason for the heartbreak and try again. Maybe you were just meant to touch their life for a moment and to move on to something more right for you. Retreat to yourself for awhile to keep your energy high, and try again. And try not to let the last guy’s mistake affect how you treat the next guy, who could be genuinely trying. 💚

Seems a little scary, right? You may be thinking why put myself through this at all? Trust me, goddess, I feel you. Life is busy and there’s a million things you can experience while you are here. It doesn’t have to necessarily be a romantic love experience at all to lead a fulfilled life. But I do know romantic love is one of the most euphoric experiences to have while you’re a human. A shot at a true partner to experience the magic of life with is worth it.

Realize that the ups and the downs, they are all here for a reason. The Universe would never let you go through a door that wasn’t yours to open. Trust the process. Trust the heartache. Even trust the sadness. The wrong ones will continue to be removed from your life one way or another. And with every door definitively shut, you are that much closer to finding the right one to finally walk through. Know this, and be at peace with it. Remember, sensitivity is a super power. And being able to love deeply and care about people you meet is the reason you’ll find romantic love this life. ✌🏼

Following Your Intuition to Your Life’s Purpose 

 

 When developing your intuition, you may often find yourself against the grain of society. You may leave a job everyone else in their rational minds would kill for. You may follow a dream that seems impossible. As you honor your inner knowingness, others may not be privy to the divine guidance you are following. Know that there is a good reason for this. 

Albert Einstein said it best when he said: “The intuitive mind is a sacred gift and the rational mind is a faithful servant. We have created a society that honors the servant and has forgotten the gift.” The world around us is often full of people who live their life by rational logic, weighing statistical chances with decision making for a safety net of a future. The truth is though that no matter how much you plan, or take the path that seems the safest, there are no guarantees that things will go as planned. Flexibility is called for as we live in a Creation that is still happening. Things are constantly changing and to pigeon hole yourself into a certain lifestyle or plan goes against your very nature as a child of the universe. The truth is, living from your intuitive self is your direct hotline to an all-knowing, all-being mind. We may not understand completely why we feel we must follow a certain path or action when we follow our intuition, but one thing is certain. A higher power definitely does understand the bigger picture, and having faith in our intuitive guidance is the first step in co-creating a life lived to the fullest. 

Many people would agree that following your intuition sounds good in theory but when putting this notion into practice, it may not be super clear. There are many things you can do to clear your mind and develop your intuition. A good place to start developing your intuition is here: Julie Tour Discusses 5 Simple Steps to Develop Psychic Awareness. There are also many divination tools that can help you sort out true divine guidance from fear. As someone who once had a cushy corporate position, drove a luxury car, and had every material perk one could ask for, I found out the hard way that following that path was not the key to happiness. I was operating from the rational, servant mind and at the end of the day, materialism is only an illusion of security and, to top it all off, my job wasn’t my true passion. If your situation isn’t fueling your passion, chances are that you missed your calling. The good news is that every day that you are still breathing, you have the opportunity to live passionately. When operating from your intuitive mind, your sacred gift from God, your life becomes magical, meaningful, and full of wonder. Never lose your divine birth right to co-create a meaningful, rewarding life. 

Tales of a Spiritually-Closeted Socialite

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Growing up, it was common knowledge for me that we had past lives, angels were real, and our loved ones never truly left us. My mom often taught my sister and I about angels and how to ask for help. We were taught to shield ourselves with white light. If we needed help with anything, we were taught to say “on Angels’ wings…”, something that my sister got tattooed as an adult. As I got older, these beliefs became internal and less acknowledged in everyday interactions. I often explained why I was a vegetarian to people, because I believed humans and animals come from the same source, but I never got much more into it than that.

My dad passed away a month before my 21st birthday. What is an American college girl to do to get over her grief? I started going out… a lot. I was the girl who orchestrated nights out, limos, and townhouse parties. As my social network grew, I often threw VIP parties at local bars, and organized themed parties at my place. I filled my grief with friends and vodka. I didn’t care if you were gay, straight, considered an outcast in high school, or what your background was. I knew life can be hard and that everyone deserved a good time. I feel that’s why so many different kinds of people were friendly with me. If you were the odd one out because you couldn’t afford to come, I would pay. If you needed a ride, I would drive. If you wanted a place to crash, I would accommodate. I loved bringing different people together and having a good time. My little pockets of friends became one big circle. I never wanted the party to end. While I delved deeper into the social scene in southeast Michigan, and made friends around my college, I also started receiving signs and messages from my father through psychics and tangible signs at synchronistic moments, which wasn’t the lightest party subject. I kept a lot of my experiences to myself for awhile. I would go out with metaphysical crystals in my purse, and an angel wing around my neck, all the while feeling a little bit like a hypocrite and not completely myself.

Through my journey I realized my most dramatic signs were experienced while sober. My biggest breakthroughs happened when I gave up drinking. I made a promise to myself to do whatever it took to take care of myself and help my intuition. I started using natural beauty products, gave up drinking, drank lots of fruit smoothies, and ate lots of healthful veggies and fruits (See video: 5 Steps to Develop Psychic Awareness). Signs were coming to me all the time, but I often missed my friends.

While most of my “party” friends lost interest in me when I stopped going out, I hung on to a few. For the sake of privacy, we will be calling my best friend, Miles. Miles and I loved going to a gay bar named Pronto in Royal Oak for Karaoke night. I remember deciding to go out again for the first time since I promised myself to take better care of myself. It would be my first sober night at this particular place.

Miles and I made our way over to the bartenders, who knew our names. I ordered a lemonade instead of my usual raspberry stoli and lemonade. The music was loud and the place was only mildly busy. We stood next to the bar, avoiding blocking others who wanted to walk up for a drink.

I started telling Miles about the increase in signs I had been getting. He knew I had experienced numerology signs, but it was evolving (See video: Signs from Heaven Using Numerology).

“It’s more than just repeating numbers now at weird times. It’s been feathers and pennies lately,” I said loudly over the music. ” I will be thinking about my dad or Angels and I will see a penny in a weird place or a feather will come into my view at that moment.”

While I was looking at Miles, I felt as if something dropped on my right foot. I looked down to see a penny facing up on my black, knee-high boot.

“Umm, are you serious right now?” I exclaimed to my friend. “Did you drop that?”

“No,” Miles answered as he held his drink.

We both looked around. There wasn’t anyone next to us or any sign of someone passing by. At that moment, we both looked up as if it fell from the sky and laughed. Miles had this contagious, goofy laugh everyone loved to mimic. The old bar ceiling was painted a dark color and had patterns that suggested it was built a century ago. It had no logical place a penny could have fallen from.

“That’s really weird,” Miles said, still laughing.

I couldn’t help but smile. I was elated at the sight of a sign right on cue.

“See what I mean! There are even Angels with us right here in the gay bar!” I said, excitedly.

Those moments taught me that the divine is everywhere with everyone, no exceptions. The absence of the divine is just perception from man and is a fallacy. Even in a late night bar with drunken people, the divine is there. No one is excluded. No moment is excluded. It took a night out in a different state of mind to marry my two experiences of life: a party girl, and a spiritual practitioner. Perception is everything.

Is that You or your Ego?

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We are free will beings. We can choose which to bring into this world: loving-self or ego-self. Ego judges and punishes. Love forgives and heals. Love is the only thing that is real.

Never take someone’s ego personally. No matter how they behave, they are still a creation from the divine. Don’t get caught up in someone’s projection of an illusion. As it is their free will choice to act in a loving way, or an ego-centric way, it is your choice whether or not to be hurt by someone else’s behaviors. Stay in the light. ✌

Natural Deodorant

I was recently asked to model my under arm and write about the natural deodorant I use. I posted about this in my “5 Steps to Develop Psychic Awareness” video on YouTube. I think it’s awesome that someone was inspired to put this together in response to the mainstream ads about deodorant with chemicals and metals.

I am a strong believer that if you have yet to have a psychic/spiritual experience it may be your lifestyle keeping you in a certain consciousness. Using all natural, organic beauty products is but one part of what I do to decalcify my pineal gland. I wanted to share my picture and story from my natural deodorant shoot.

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“Decalcifying my pineal gland is very important to me. My challenge was to be as comfortable in my own skin as possible while going all-natural. I wanted to still feel girly instead of grungy as I let my inner Earth goddess out. Eliminating metals and chemicals from beauty products drastically improved my overall health and intuition. I switched to using an organic peppermint oil by Aura Cacia. I still smell great and keep cool while I feel naturally clean. My husband likes the smell too.”

Julie Tour Discusses 5 Simple Steps to Develop Psychic Awareness

My passion is to help people develop their own psychic abilities, re-establishing a personal connection to the divine. If you have not yet had a spiritual experience, it is more than likely your lifestyle keeping you in a certain consciousness. My journey is not the only possible journey, but I have definitely picked up a few things that have tremendously helped my intuition and psychic experiences along the way that I would like to share with you. Please feel free to post any feedback, questions, or tips you have picked up yourself while developing your intuition. Namaste xo.

God Bless This Mess

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Had to share a post from my Instagram @julietour:

Sheryl Crow concert August 2008 with my BFF Mike!

I write about this night in great detail in my upcoming book. This night was a few months before my father passed. Sheryl opened up with a song that forever changed my views on consciousness called “God Bless This Mess.”

I was working at my Dad’s insurance office at the time for a company that my Mom had also worked for, and coincidentally was how they were first introduced. My parents names are Robert and Teresa.

Song Lyrics: “Got a job in town selling insurance on the phone with Robert and Teresa and two con men from back home. Everyone I call up doesn’t have the time to chat. Everybody is so busy doing this and doing that. Something has gone missing and it makes me kind of sad. God Bless This Mess.”

Other than my parents names and insurance, the rest of it didn’t make sense till years later. I ended up working for an office within a mile from my Dad’s old office years after he passed. I worked with people from the area where our first house was located. I found myself in a situation where I ended up being in a whistleblower situation with a couple of the guys I was working with. I also developed a texting word track and strategy that agents still use today because people weren’t answering sales calls as much as they used to. The song popped on my iPod one day when I was meditating and asking for guidance about how unhappy I was in that office. It was amazing that lyrics someone wrote years prior lined up with my life perfectly. I felt my Dad was watching over me. This situation not only proved to me that consciousness survives after death, but also that time is anything but linear. I firmly believe that God works through each one of us like he worked through Sheryl Crow to bring me a divine message… All we have to do is be authentic in our self expression.

I have gone through a huge spiritual transformation during the past 6 years. People wonder how I had such a dramatic restoration of faith. It is honestly because dramatic signs like this keep happening to me! And all I had to do was ask the angels for help with an open, loving heart. I am an ordinary girl who has been blessed to have some extraordinary experiences. The spiritual experience is here for everyone.