When the Unthinkable Happens: 5 Lessons from the Afterlife 

Hearing about the death of a family member has triggered some deep reflection today. I think back to losing my dad, and how painful the funeral and family drama really was for me and my sibling. Dealing with a close death was probably one of the hardest things I’ve ever had to go through, and I did it at such a young age. At the same time, it has taught me so much more about myself, existence, and divine timing than I could have ever imagined. It’s easy when something traumatic happens in this third dimensional reality to focus on the physical absence. What’s beautiful has been to see my dad reach out to us through undeniable signs, famous mediums, and not-so-famous intuitives during the passed eight years. I chronicle these life changing experiences in my upcoming book. 

There are a few life and afterlife lessons I have learned definitively that I want to share with those who are grieving today: 

1. Death is completely physical. Consciousness survives the physical death of the body. I received confirmation upon confirmation of this fact. One of the most hair raising moments was when it sounded like my dad’s voice and personality was literally coming through Theresa Caputo, TLC’s The Long Island Medium. Furthermore, modern science is also explaining death is an illusion through quantum physics. 

2. While no one ever really dies, their perspective changes to a metaphysical perspective. They no longer see existence from this third dimensional, human experience. Having this new bird’s eye view enables our loved ones to watch over us and work with angels to bring us signs, serving a new purpose in our lives as guardian angels. 

3. No matter how abrupt or untimely the death of someone seems, all death is on divine time. Awakening to this fact requires faith and trust. Like all experiences in life, we have the free will choice to let the experience tear us apart or make us stronger than ever. Making positive interpretations of death brings us to the highest perspective, inviting the miraculous into our lives. 

4. Speaking with our deceased loved ones is only a mental phone call away. While I didn’t always get an immediate reply, my dad always heard me and found ways to answer my questions. Know that they do see us, hear us, and know what we are going through. 

5. Our loved ones find their loved ones who have passed on the other side. No one is ever really alone and separation is an illusion. One of the first things my dad let me know is that he found his brother, which I wrote about how I came to know this years ago in my blog post “All Gays Go to Heaven“. 

These lessons have been learned through a lot of tears, and a lot of healing. My heart goes out to everyone going through losing a loved one. My intention is to share my experiences with the hope it brings comfort to those who feel lost. No one ever really dies, and death is not the end, just a doorway. We all eventually walk through that door. Love shared is eternal, and you will meet again. 

Facing Perception and Rejection

  
During the time in my life I consider my spiritual awakening, everything I had come to know was transitioning. I had surrounded myself in high school and college with very judgmental people who loved to gossip, chase wealth, party, and position themselves as elite in many ways. It has taken many years to funnel the people out of my life who refused to grow, and surround myself with totally accepting, loving people. I started this journey alone in many respects as I let go of those that no longer had my best interest at heart. I had experienced so many synchronistic moments after my dad had passed that I was busting at the seams wanting to share them. I sometimes worried about what others would think of me if I openly talked about signs from heaven and life after death. The beautiful truth that the dead are never lost is something that I wanted to share beyond myth, legend, and fairytale. Synchronicity made this truth tangible for me, and I felt my story would help others. Synchronicity taught me that all beings are deeply connected, even in death. I felt a deep calling to make this work the center of my life. 

There was one day in particular, right after I quit the insurance biz and focused on writing, that I meditated outside behind my apartment in the sun. There was a long stretch of grass near the woods that lined up against my complex that I often liked to visit. It was a gorgeous spring day. I sat concentrating on a patch of dandelions nearby. The only way I can describe my state of being was one of a blissful trance. I was beaming from the inside out and smiling. I felt at peace with myself and finally free from pressures of a stuffy business job and business school. I knew others (at least the others that were in my life at that point in time) would not understand my choices, but I wanted to share this peace I had found with the world. 
A thought came to me as I happily sat near a bunch of dandelions, enjoying their beautiful bright yellow color that resonated with me as such a happy flower. I thought about how many people think of this beautiful flower as a weed. I realized that I was very much like a dandelion as well. I remember concentrating on a particular sentence as I continued to meditate: “Some people think I am a weed, but really I am a beautiful flower.” This truth truly freed me from any perceived judgements of others. At that moment, it didn’t matter what anyone said or thought about me. My heart was full of love and my soul was lit by a calling to share my spiritual experiences, no matter how others perceived my choices. 

I sat in the sun for quite some time until finally I decided to make my way back to my apartment. As I opened the screen door, I was greeted by my two miniature dachshunds, Reesie and Scooby. Over their happy yelps and wagging tails due to my return home, I heard my email notification on my iPhone go off. I picked up my phone off of the kitchen table to check it out. It was a Live Nation email letting me know I was eligible for a pre-sale for my husband’s favorite band that was going to be playing across the street at Meadowbrook, where they had never played before. I could often hear bands play there from my place it was so close. Extremely interested, I scrolled down the email to get the code. To my absolute joy, the code for the pre-sale just happened to be “dandelion” when moments ago I had meditated so intensely on a dandelion. Albert Einstein once said coincidence is God’s way of remaining anonymous. I took this meaningful coincidence as validation of my break through. When synchronicity happens, I often perceive the meaningful coincidence as the universe’s way of telling me to keep going. 

From that moment on, I haven’t cared about what other people think of me. If there is one thing I learned from that experience it is that even if the majority of the population perceives you as a weed, you will still find others out there who know you as the beautiful flower you are. The perception of a weed and a flower is only established by your mentality. The way you view the world is your choice. To let others’ choices define you is a mistake in thinking. My hope is that this story helps you overcome the judgement of others and know true freedom to be yourself.