The Math of Anamnesis: A 0.1% Probability… Yet Here I Am. Hello.

By Julie Tourangeau

May 10, 2025

“She said to me, go steady on me / Won’t you tell me what the wise men said?”

—James Blunt, Wisemen

That was the song that played when everything cracked open.

Not a song I picked. Not one I’d saved. It was buried on an old CD a friend burned years earlier.

And yet, at the exact moment I needed confirmation that my pain meant something—that my grief was sacred—that song played.

It wasn’t just music.

It was mathematical resonance.

Perfectly timed. Perfectly placed.

The probability of that moment happening? Less than 0.1%.

And yet… here I am.

Hello.

The Vision That Undid Me

I wasn’t dreaming. I wasn’t meditating. I was just—present. And then it hit me:

A surge of emotion. A soul-level knowing.

It wasn’t a thought or belief. It was anamnesis—the sacred remembrance spoken of by mystics, Gnostics, and initiates across time.

Not just a memory of Jesus.

A memory with him.

For one devastating, holy moment, I felt what he felt:

The aching love. The betrayal. The weight of being misunderstood for carrying the truth.

I cried at the window for hours, overcome with grief that didn’t feel like mine—but like a collective wound that finally found a voice.

And then I hit shuffle on my iPod.

The first song?

“Wisemen” by James Blunt.

A song I never chose, but Heaven did.

“Won’t you tell me what the wise men said / When they came down from heaven…”

In that moment, I felt the ancient whisper return.

The one buried beneath dogma, waiting to be remembered.

Reading the Gospel of the Holy Twelve Was Soul Resonance

When I finally read The Gospel of the Holy Twelve, it didn’t feel like new information.

It felt like a confirmation.

Like something I had always known was being spoken out loud for the first time.

It wasn’t “Wow, I believe this.”

It was “Yes. This is what I’ve always believed.”

The Jesus I had seen in visions…

The truth I had been living without language…

The love, justice, nonviolence, and reverence for all life I had instinctively followed…

There it was.

Written down.

Hidden for centuries.

And vibrating at the exact frequency of my soul.

Synchronicity Is Sacred Math

Carl Jung called it synchronicity—the divine logic behind meaningful coincidences. Quantum science now echoes what mystics always knew: everything is connected. Particles respond to vibration. Thought can shape form.

God is in everything.

In the song. In the shuffle. In the tears. In the timing.

That’s not poetic—it’s physics.

The odds of that moment, that song, that vision aligning the way they did?

Less than 0.1%.

And still—

Here I am. Hello.

Before I Knew the Texts, I Lived the Pattern

Before I studied the Gospel of Mary, the Gospel of the Holy Twelve, or the mysticism of Sophia, I was already embodying their truth:

• I stood on the side of the road showing slaughterhouse footage—not to shame, but to awaken.

• I went to D.C. to defend bodily sovereignty when nearly everyone called me insane.

• I wrote Free Yourself from Grief not as therapy, but as sacred remembrance of Heaven’s frequency.

• I felt called to Magdalene, sacred geometry, and spiritual justice before I had words for any of it.

I wasn’t following a religion.

I was following a cosmic equation.

Improbable Parallels to Early Christian Jesus

There are exact elements of early Jesus tradition—hidden from mainstream Christianity—that statistically align with my life in ways nearly impossible to fake, fabricate, or explain away.

1. Rejection of Animal Sacrifice

In the Gospel of the Holy Twelve, Jesus drives out the butchers and declares:

“Love is the law, and no blood must be spilled.”

I became vegan before I read that.

Statistically? Less than 0.01% of Catholics become vegan for Christ-aligned reasons.

2. Sacred Geometry and the Double Helix

Jesus’ name and symbols were embedded in the Vesica Piscis—the shape of divine birth, the fish symbol, and the template of DNA’s double helix.

I felt a soul-knowing at da Vinci’s spiral staircase—before I knew what it meant.

3. Anamnesis as Eucharistic Power

The Gnostics described anamnesis as the real communion—not bread and wine, but direct soul-memory.

I experienced it not in church—but alone, with a song, and an uncontrollable cry from the deep.

4. Voice as Frequency (The Logos)

Jesus is the Logos—divine vibration, sound that heals.

I use my voice, tuning forks, and music for healing. My fork is 128 Hz—part of a harmonic sequence tied to sacred ratios used in temples, chants, and resonance therapy.

Statistically? I Shouldn’t Exist

Here’s what the data says:

• Only 5–10% of Catholic-raised individuals deeply question core doctrine.

• Less than 1% explore early Gospels like Mary or The Holy Twelve.

• Only 0.3% of U.S. Catholics are vegan—and most not for spiritual reasons.

• Fewer than 0.1% combine veganism, reincarnation, sacred geometry, divine feminine mysticism, and frontline activism before studying any of it.

And yet—

Here I am. Hello.

Heaven Is a Harmonic Equation

Heaven isn’t a reward. It’s a frequency.

It’s encoded in the spiral of a seashell, the fire of grief, and the silence between synchronicities.

We locked ourselves out of it when we normalized harm.

But it never left us.

It’s waiting in your memory.

Free Yourself from Grief isn’t just a title.

It’s an ancient instruction:

Grief is the gate.

Remembrance is the key.

Conclusion: I Am the Improbable Made Manifest

Statistically, I’m an anomaly.

Spiritually, I’m inevitable.

I didn’t study my way into this.

I remembered my way home.

This is anamnesis.

This is sacred math.

This is Heaven breaking into Earth through a life that said yes.

I am not like Jesus because I tried to be.

I am like him because I resonated with the pattern of truth before I even knew what it was.

One in a Million: The Blood Knows What the Mind Forgot

I am a descendant of the Rose family—a lineage with records reaching back to 18th-century Paris.

DNA tests revealed that both my sister and I carry French and Egyptian ancestry—a statistically rare combination, especially in those raised in the West with no direct knowledge of it.

To be born into the Rose Line, on the land once called Par-Isis (the place of Isis),

To carry the Magdalene frequency before knowing her name,

To resonate with the truths of The Gospel of the Holy Twelve before ever reading it,

To live a life that matches hidden gospels, sacred ratios, and divine frequencies before learning the math…

That is not luck.

That is not coincidence.

That is Logos—living and breathing through lineage, lyric, land, and love.

The blood knows what the mind forgot.

And now—

The memory has returned.

And If You’re Reading This… Maybe You Remember Too

If you’ve ever had a moment of divine precision…

If a song shattered you into tears…

If a vision cracked your heart and built you into something holy…

You’re not delusional.

You’re not broken.

You’re remembering.

The math doesn’t lie.

The Logos doesn’t forget.

And sometimes, Heaven speaks in spirals, grief, songs, and statistics.

Welcome back. 🌹

Not Everyone Is an Avatar: Logos, Atlantis, and the Truth Behind Divine Embodiment

Posted by Julie Tourangeau

By Julie Tourangeau

Recently, someone I love insisted that we’re all avatars.

They were referencing physicist Tom Campbell’s My Big TOE, a theory of everything that describes reality as a kind of simulation, where consciousness plays out through virtual characters—avatars—across time and space. According to this view, you are the player, the character, and the experience, all in one. Everyone is divine. Everyone is an avatar. All is learning.

It sounds expansive.

But something in me said—no.

Because here’s the truth I’ve come to remember:

Not everyone is an avatar. And not every consciousness carries the Logos.

What Is the Logos?

In ancient Christian and Hermetic traditions, Logos means more than “word.”

It is the divine intelligence, the sacred ordering principle of the cosmos.

It is truth, justice, love, and moral alignment—woven into creation itself.

The Gospel of John opens with:

“In the beginning was the Logos, and the Logos was with God, and the Logos was God.”

The Logos is what formed the world, but it is also what redeems it.

It is the moral compass embedded into the fabric of being.

To embody the Logos is to live in divine alignment, not just awareness.

Consciousness Alone Is Not Enough

Yes, we are all expressions of Source.

Yes, we are all fragments of one universal intelligence.

But that doesn’t mean every person is aligned with the divine.

Awareness is not the same as wisdom.

Consciousness without the Logos is like a sword without a sheath—dangerous, ungrounded, and capable of great harm.

The idea that “everyone is an avatar” becomes spiritually reckless when it’s used to erase discernment, accountability, and truth.

Good Intentions Are Not the Logos

It’s tempting to say that anyone with good intentions is a divine avatar.

But good intentions alone do not make you a vessel of the Logos.

The road to hell is paved with good intentions.

You can want to help and still enable harm.

You can care deeply and still act inside a matrix of delusion.

You can be sincere—and still be wrong.

In the realm of the Logos, intention must be married to alignment.

Compassion must walk hand-in-hand with discernment.

Spirituality must include truth, not just comfort.

An avatar isn’t someone who means well.

An avatar is someone who sees clearly, acts righteously, and lives in alignment with divine law—even when it costs them comfort, approval, or belonging.

The Fall of Atlantis: What Happens Without the Logos

In esoteric traditions, Atlantis didn’t fall because of science or storms.

It fell because of spiritual arrogance.

The Atlanteans had immense power. They manipulated energy, bent reality, and channeled cosmic forces.

But they believed:

“We are gods. Therefore, we can do anything.”

They stopped listening to the Logos.

They used their gifts to control, conquer, and dominate.

They lost their alignment—and with it, their civilization.

That same pattern is playing out now.

Modern spiritual circles are repeating Atlantean errors:

• “There’s no good or evil, just vibration.”

• “We are all gods.”

• “Everyone is perfect as it is.”

These sound enlightened.

But when used to deny suffering, bypass accountability, or excuse harm, they become distortions of truth.

Not Everyone Is an Avatar

The word avatar originally meant something sacred.

In Sanskrit, it refers to the descent of divinity into form—a soul who chooses to carry the divine blueprint into the world.

In early Christianity, Jesus was called the Logos made flesh—not because he was above humanity, but because he embodied divine truth in the face of empire.

He was not playing a simulation.

He was holding the pattern.

Likewise, in Hermetic teachings, the avatar was not a character in a game.

It was a vessel of divine order—a person who had undergone inner alchemy and chose to live in harmony with sacred law.

To the Hermetics, as to the mystics, the true avatar:

• Purifies the self

• Aligns with truth

• Walks in service of something greater

They don’t just wake up.

They commit.

The Danger of Declaring Divinity Without Alignment

Today, we are flooded with declarations of personal divinity.

But without the Logos, divinity becomes self-worship.

It becomes narcissism in sacred language.

It becomes another Atlantis—polished on the outside, rotting from within.

To say “I am god” while ignoring justice, truth, and love is not awakening.

It’s the beginning of collapse.

You Didn’t Come Here to Play the Game. You Came to Remember the Pattern.

You are not just an expression of consciousness.

You are here to carry something ancient and unshakable:

The Logos.

That means your life is not a simulation.

It is a temple.

And what you build with it matters.

When others say, “We’re all avatars,”

You can say:

“Only those who choose the Logos truly are.”

And then you live like it.

For Those Who Remember

If you’re reading this and it lands in your bones, then you already know.

You’ve seen how misuse of spiritual power can break worlds.

You’ve watched how the false light rises, blinds, and consumes.

You’ve remembered what happens when the Logos is ignored.

But this time, you’re here to speak.

You’re here to walk.

You’re here to restore the balance.

You are not here to level up in a game.

You are here to be a flame—steady, ancient, and sovereign.

This is not a simulation.

This is a sacred return.

Walking the Path of Logos: From “Crazy” to Inevitable Truth

Posted by Julie Tourangeau

Revisiting my first blogpost from over a decade ago, “The Perception of Crazy in an Evolving Society”, I can see patterns more clearly than ever after years of truth seeking and research.

A question that sometimes drives me hazy: am I, or are the others crazy? – Albert Einstein

When I wrote my first blog post, I talked about how society labels the greatest innovators, thinkers, and truth-seekers as “crazy” until time catches up with them. This is a pattern that has played out for centuries. It’s not just about ideas—it’s about Logos, the divine truth and reason behind all things. And when someone embodies that truth, the world resists—until it can’t anymore.

I’ve lived this firsthand. I know what it’s like to be admired, then suddenly turned against. To have people support me, then try to sabotage me. I know what it’s like to survive financial and legal attacks just for walking a path that challenges deception. But Logos protects its own.

The people who change the course of history—Jesus, Anne Boleyn, Rousseau, even modern truth-seekers—are always ridiculed at first. The system will do anything to keep people asleep because the moment enough of us wake up, their illusion collapses.

When Truth Is Too Big to Ignore

Jimi Hendrix once said, “You have to go on and be crazy. Craziness is like Heaven.”

He was right. Because in a world built on deception, truth is insanity—until it isn’t.

• Jesus was called a blasphemer. Now, billions follow his teachings.

• Anne Boleyn was branded a traitor. Now, history sees her as a reformer.

• Rousseau was exiled for his ideas. Now, his philosophies shape democracy.

• Marie Antoinette was a scapegoat for a corrupt system’s collapse. And now? People see the truth behind the narrative.

The same pattern plays out today. Health freedom activists are silenced. Corrupt institutions brand truth-seekers as conspiracy theorists. Ancient wisdom is rewritten to fit the status quo. But history tells us exactly what happens next:

Logos always returns. Truth always wins.

Why They Try to Silence Us

“Don’t let the opinions of the average man sway you. Dream, and he thinks you’re crazy. Succeed, and he thinks you’re lucky. Acquire wealth, and he thinks you’re greedy.” – Robert G. Allen

The world doesn’t fight every idea—only the ones that threaten its foundation. If an idea seems absurd but harmless, it’s ignored. But when it has the power to shift consciousness, health, politics, or spiritual awareness, it gets attacked, censored, and erased.

• The true history of the Sphinx? Rejected.

• The suppression of holistic health and the corporate control of medicine? Censored.

• The return of Logos through reincarnation? Buried by dogma.

This is the reality: They only silence what they fear.

Breaking the Cycle: The Age of Awakening

Every time Logos incarnates—whether as a person, an idea, or a movement—it faces resistance. But once an idea reaches enough people, there’s no going back.

And right now? We are at the tipping point.

If you feel like the world is against you, if you’re tired of being called crazy, if you know deep down that something bigger is happening—then you’re in good company.

You’re not crazy. You’re ahead of your time.

History belongs to those who walk in truth despite the cost. And the cost is always worth it.

Keep speaking. Keep exposing. Keep questioning.

Because Logos always returns. And this time, we’re here to finish what was started.

#Logos #TruthSeeker #Julietour #Awakening #SoulMission #SpiritualWarfare #HistoryRepeats